Twenty reasons to enjoy early motherhood

1.  You have a super cute baby that's all yours and only yours
2.  People will do anything you ask, so make the most of it
3.  You probably won't have to cook for the first month
4.  Eat all the chocolate you want because a) you deserve it and b) you're totally skinny now
5.  You can shoot milk out of your boobs
6.  You have every right to adopt that smug "oh-you-have-no-idea" look when childless people tell you they're tired
7.  You now have a little friend that you can talk to (at?) about anything and all they'll do is smile and nod - think of it as therapy without the price tag
8.  You can whinge all you want and be totally irrational and get away with it
9.  Professionals say you should ingest 1L of milk products a day to keep your calcium intake up, that includes milk/milkshakes, yogurt and ice cream so go on, reach for that tub of Cookies & Cream and go for gold
10. People on buses have to move for you and if they don't it's OK to shoot them a smacked-arse evil eye
11. You can park in the baby only parks and enjoy your 2 second walk to the mall while everyone else makes the 5 minute trek
12. You can now eat all the sashimi, blue cheese and salami you want
13. Two months later, you're still receiving gifts
14. You can stay in your pyjama's all day long and not feel like a slob
15. People will understand that your house is a complete tip and will probably even offer to clean it for you
16. For a good night out, all you need is two glasses of wine and you're set
17. You have an excuse to go shopping - you're stuck between maternity and pre-baby and after all, you must have clothes that are breastfeeding friendly
18. For the first week, you can pretend you have breast implants
19. You don't have to pretend to be Supermum, most people will think you already are
20. You have now endured the most pain you will ever experience so things can only get better